nycdaug Chapter 91: Remembering – 2
Chapter 91: Remembering – 2
chapter 91: remembering – 2
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she wanted me to make her the heroine.
since it was her giving permission, i happily agreed, but she asked me to pay for the drinks that day in return.
i remember she only drank soju that day, as if she was determined not to get drunk.
after getting quite intoxicated, she said something like this:
“where in the world can you find someone who suits the role of a heroine so well?”
her smiling face is still quite vivid.
certainly, she was such a bright person that if she had gotten married, she might have become someone’s one and only heroine in life.
whatever the case, it’s all in the past now.
“so, is the heroine happy with the protagonist?”
“die in the prologue.”
“is the team leader the type to want to kill someone if they love them? yandere or something?”
“huh?”
“...never mind. forget i said anything.”
with those thoughts, “miso” was created based on jo ayoon.
she was cheerful, caring, and had more laughter than anyone else.
thinking back, miso received a lot of love after the release.
so, in this life, i wanted to create a character like that, but i can’t capture the same feelings as back then.
those impressions have faded.
time is truly frightening.
“boss...?”
jo ayoon poked my shoulder as i was lost in thought.
“oh, sorry. i was lost in thought.”
“i-it’s okay!”
hehe, jo ayoon laughed.
then she handed me a box wrapped in a cloth.
“my mom brought it. it’s, it’s side dishes!”
ah, is that so?
her mother often gives side dishes.
she’s expressing gratitude, saying something like, “thank you for making my daughter a good person.”
at first, i refused, but i could see her disappointment every time, so now i accept it without complaint.
most importantly, it’s a hassle to make those kinds of side dishes by my hand.
“you her know i’ll eat it well.”
“you don’t have to eat it well! it’s just a bunch of wild vegetables anyway!”
if you speak cheerfully like that, will it really be fine? making vegetable dishes requires a lot of effort.
at times like this, i realize how young i am.
looking back, i used to hate greens even in my past life.
even when eating pork belly, i would say, “there’s no room for greens in my stomach,” and just eat the meat.
suddenly, seeing that scene, something came to mind.
“...smile.”
if not much has changed, wouldn’t the current jo ayoon also have points to apply to miso?
or could she serve as a good medium to recall the jo ayoon of the past life?
feeling a tug at my heart, i immediately spoke.
“ayoon.”
“yes?”
“tomorrow is the weekend, what are you doing?”
jo ayoon’s lips were slightly raised.
“me...”
“wanna go out for some fresh air?”
“yes!”
she answered without even thinking.
well, i’m grateful, but...
“where are we going?”
jo ayoon’s smile brightly bloomed.
it seemed like even the creature in her eyes wanted to go out.
“where do you want to go?”
“umm...”
with her eyes tightly closed, jo ayoon pondered.
it doesn’t matter where.
the purpose was to observe her.
eventually, jo ayoon responded.
“...ah! i want to go there!”
“hmm?”
“to the aquarium!”
an aquarium, at least it wouldn’t be noisy.
“okay, let’s go to the aquarium then.”
that’s how the holiday plans were decided.
the next day came, and i asked jo ayoon who was facing me.
“ayoon, did you go to the wedding?”
“yes?”
for once again, she wasn’t in her frog-patterned tracksuit but wearing a skirt.
***
the wedding didn’t happen, and the change of clothes was just a simple change of mind. maybe it’s the age of enjoying dressing up.
so, i entered the aquarium.
it’s not a matter of a few years but a few decades since i last visited an aquarium.
i’m not someone who enjoys going out often, and i’m not particularly interested in following such attractions, so it’s really the first time since my previous life.
it wasn’t bad.
watching the fish swimming in the tank made me feel calm.
of course, i didn’t forget observing jo ayoon.
“mr. ceo...! it’s a white-fleshed fish!”
and so, after that fleeting moment, a sense of unnecessary longing arose and was resolved.
even though it was undoubtedly a brief moment, amidst it, memories vividly painted the jo ayoon of that day at a speed i couldn’t chase.
it felt like the dust accumulated on an old frame had been swept away.
after that whole process, i finally realized.
the jo ayoon with clear memories on top was no different from the one from that day.
‘you...’
so clear.
no matter what it looked like on the surface, inside, she was just as clear as in my past life.
it felt like being hit on the back of the head.
realizing that seeing jo ayoon differently was just a remnant of my narrow-mindedness.
or, maybe i simply hadn’t seen her properly.
no, it could be that i didn’t see her properly.
looking back, i felt a sense of guilt.
i felt sorry for the times when she wasn’t treated well, yet she continued to support me until the end.
i felt sorry for letting her stay in the team just because of me.
i had a thought that i might be hindering her, and it might have continued into this life.
this friend who always sided with me deserves a more remarkable life than my past life as a repayment.
those were the thoughts i had.
maybe, this friend might not value such things as important.
“money and fame aren’t that important? i just like enjoying every moment.”
jo ayoon smiled when she faced people, whether in my past life or this one.
jo ayoon preferred ordinary conversations over talking about things like fame.
‘···ah.’
it wasn’t till now that it occurred to me.
what i had borrowed from jo ayoon while creating miso.
“happy! if even one person is smiling, doesn’t it make others feel a little better?”
the cheerful spirit that barely held the always precarious team together.
that was the motif of the smile.
“ma, manager...!”
with teeth visible as she smiled brightly, jo ayoon was in high spirits.
“oh, thank you for calling me today! happy birthday...!”
“huh?”
“it’s your birthday...!”
ah, right.
march 11th. today is my birthday.
so it seems like the game jo ayoon liked didn’t come out today.
it was just a misunderstanding, but realizing such consideration, i was grateful.
i could only manage to say, “thanks.”
jo ayoon raised her glass.
“well then, cheers...!”
“cheers...”
the soju glasses clinked.
with the sound, it felt like a curtain that had covered my vision was pierced.
it was a sensation of finally grasping something that had been missing.
the gathering continued like that.
“oh, today we live and die...!”
jo ayoon thoroughly practiced her own words.
“at, at your house...?”
“in front of your house.”
“ooh...!”
...it would have been truly beautiful if it had ended there.
***
two days later, i arrived at work and sat in front of the computer. turning it on with a light heart, i revisited the scenario of the prologue.
“miso said to the wriggling e-40 in bed, ‘it’s dangerous to move like that! just endure until you’re completely better.’”
a girl who was warm to everyone and never lost her smile. a person like sunshine that melts the world with her smile. it was an expression meant to represent such a character.
and now, i realized that this expression was very mundane.
“she don’t need to be kind.”
regardless of words, a person who spreads smiles brightens the surroundings with their kind heart alone. a person who can reach out for others sincerely shows their sincerity through actions. therefore, the warmth that doesn’t ask for a reason sometimes appeared as whimsical.
realizing these things, i corrected the dialogue.
“if you don’t want to be fish bait, it’s better to stay quiet! i’m really good at fighting!”
miso could become an even more mischievous girl if she wanted to. even then, she would still be a clear-minded child.
now satisfied, i saved the modified file.
that’s when i heard voices.
“oh my! ayoon dyed her hair?”
“yes!”
the sound reached me.
when i lifted my head, jo ayoon was visible.
making eye contact with me, jo ayoon approached with a bouncing step, smiling brightly.
“boss! how about this? it’s a two-tone dye!”
jo ayoon showed me the tips of her hair.
only that part was dyed pink.
i wondered what had gotten into her.
even while contemplating, her expression showed genuine satisfaction.
as much as the hair tips dyed in pink, her smile became even more vibrant.
when asked about my opinion, i replied, “it suits you well.”
jo ayoon indeed looked good in pink.
“re-really? my mom liked it too! oh! if you need more side dishes, just let me know!”
“okay.”
it was a refreshing spring.
an afternoon where i gained a good realization.
the smile of jo ayoon in her twenty-third year of this life had already become that of a mature /romancemtl